It recently occurred to me that all the areas of my life have been changed and directly impacted by the indwelling of the Holy Spirit. So, when I heard someone talking about the fruit of the Spirit, it occurred to me that I would never have shown any outward signs of  "real fruit" in my life if I hadn't turned away from my old ways and back to the Lord's way.   

The truth was blatantly obvious. I wasn't capable of feeling true joy, love, patience, gentleness, or goodness because of the life I once lived. My life made me rigid, mean, and judgmental.

For example, most of my life was filled with trauma and instability. I had a terrible past filled with broken relationships, no trust, no faith, no truth about the world or spiritual matters. I survived emancipation at sixteen years of age, lived in survival mode the majority of my life, a year or two of homelessness, unplanned pregnancies, abortions, drugs and partying, marriage/divorce, child custody battles, controlling and abusive relationships, adultery, mental health struggles, physical health struggles, and three neurological traumas all before age thirty - five. 

Except now my life is very different. I'm always happy, peaceful, patient, gentle, good, and have real joy. So I wrote out all the areas of my life where God showed up and taught me His ways. It was through my small acts of obedience and following His lead daily that my life was eventually turned into what I consider a work of art. Because that's what it feels like when you give your life back to God and turn from your old ways.

Allowing the Holy Spirit to have His way in your life is what ultimately brings forth fruit of the Spirit.

 If you live by your own rules, you will have drama and distractions; you will not act in godly ways. But if you implement the teachings of Christ and do things God's way, He will begin to work in all the broken areas until you realize there's nothing to be sad, mad, or have hatred about.

Real love for God, yourself, and others resurfaces along with joy, peace, patience, long suffering, gentleness, faith, meekness, and temperance. Because that is what the Bible calls fruit of the Spirit.

So, I listed all the areas the Lord has restored in and throughout my life over the last nine years.

I followed wherever I felt the Holy Spirit was leading me, and together we worked on things little by little. Now I understand what the fruit of the Spirit truly means, and it took a lot of internal and external work to receive it and understand it.

Internal restoration:

- How I see the world

- True repentance

- True forgiveness of myself and others

- What is true about me

- I understand belief systems and where they stem from

- I understand the Spiritual war

- I understand the Holy Trinity

- The big picture about Biblical doctrine

- Worldly understandings

- Understand how sin affects our mind, soul, God, and eternity

- Mental health and how it occurs

- How neurological function starts to decline and where it thrives

- I know what darkness means and how we all fell into it

- How to find the light and stay in it

- What it takes to walk out of darkness

- Mental organization and how to categorize what I've been taught

- I learned my worth and value

- I learned about God's skills and character and how they complement and belong together

External Restoration:

- No chaos anywhere

- Relationships have been repaired

- Strive for peace with every situation

- Career has been restored

- Credit/finances have been restored

- Child custody issues have been resolved

- Everything is clean and organized - my home, my car, my mind, etc.

Spiritual restoration:

- I understand that obedience keeps me safe in the light with God

- Outward obedience to the Commandments and Christ's teachings is implemented daily

- Daily prayer life

- Actively working with the Holy Spirit every day

- Follow whereverJesus leads me

- I trust God's plan for my life and consult everything with Him beforehand.

- Know when I receive direction to move forward

- I work hard not to push people away from God and the Word

- Glorifying God daily through every aspect of my life - My body, my mind, the music I listen to, the shows I watch and listen to, how I treat people,ople and my relationships.

- Through my ministry - I share my story with the Trinity with all family and friends, website, blogs, podcasts, book, and speaking events.

This isn't everything that's been restored. It's just to give you an idea of how the fruit of the Spirit is produced. The craziest part is that as these things were happening, I never felt overwhelmed. I just stayed focused on God. Little by little, every area of my life started to shape up. And before I knew it, everything felt cleaned out, organized, and understood. I had no choice but to feel peace and joy; all my problems disappeared.

The me today is nothing like the me nine years ago. I always wanted to be this version of myself, but it all felt unattainable. Now I am the real me, and I also know who helped me get here.

Life doesn't have to stay where it's at. God wants you to be part of His family. He is the most amazing Father. He has completely changed my life in ways I never imagined. My walk with Jesus means everything to me. He is always leading me in the right direction. And when I mess up, He gently guides me back to the right path. This is a transformative journey in every way.

To me, the best part is knowing God and each member of the Trinity. They are my family, and I trust all of them with every part of my life. I feel seen, heard, loved, guided, protected, and restored. They will never give up on you. Never lose faith and always keep pushing forward. One day, you too will look up and say WOW this is more than I could have EVER asked for.