I thought I knew what it meant to love myself. All my life, I praised myself for how strong I was; no matter what life threw at me, I knew I could get through it. I thought being mentally strong and being able to endure difficult life situations meant I loved myself.

That has nothing to do with love. In fact, I turned myself inside out to make it through my life. By the time I reached thirty-five, I was completely unrecognizable on the inside.

Thankfully, God and Jesus made themselves known to me right before my head injury. Together, with the Holy Spirit, they all played a role in helping me recover. The love shown to me over the last nine years can't be put into words.

With every act of obedience I took, I started noticing a new me emerging. Obedience was giving me the backbone I always wanted.

Obedience created an environment where I had to say no. Because of obedience, I couldn't be manipulated by men anymore. Obedience weeded out those who intended to use me for their own selfish ends. Obedience exposed people's darkness and shed light on all the areas where the enemy was trying to attack my life.

I lost my self-worth while living in darkness. I allowed this life to destroy all the good parts of me. Thankfully, we have a God who restores us to our original design. It doesn't happen overnight. But He will give you back everything the enemy stole.

God once told me, "We were only trying to keep people safe." I now know for a fact that when we listen to God, do things His way, and follow all of Christ's teachings, we are indeed kept safe from everyone and everything that can hurt us.

Little by little, every act of obedience provided a wall of protection around me. Now, I can honestly say I love myself.

Right now, you may think your trauma came from a person or a group of people; I encourage you to keep pursuing God and the truth about Jesus Christ. Every teaching is a layer of protection, but you won't understand its meaning until you start applying it in life.

One day you will wake up, look in the mirror, and see a version of yourself you never knew existed.